Hearts to God (The Hearts to God Series) Read online

  “You have me to vouch for you. You may not have known our parents, but I certainly did.” Sarah stiffened.

  “I see.” The problem was that Doc was Chinese; that was all. Sarah, the daughter of two dirt farmers who died of tuberculosis could have no pretensions for herself, or her orphaned sister, surely. “No. I don’t see. What do our parents have to do with Doc Lee?” She raised an eyebrow at her sister.

  Sarah gritted her teeth. “If you can’t see that, I hardly know what to tell you.”

  “I don’t know what you are so fussed over. I don’t plan on marrying anyone, much less a Chinaman.”

  “If that were all it was…”

  “What then?”

  “Isn’t it obvious? Did they teach you nothing of the world back there?”

  “As a matter of a fact, they did not. Though the school they ran was excellent and my knowledge of letters and math is quite good, they took great pains to keep us from worldly knowledge.”

  Sarah stood quivering under the hot sun, her eyes wide, and her face pale.

  Madeline watched her sister’s physical discomfort increase, the trouble dawning on her. Sarah was brought to mute fury because his parents hadn’t been married—that had to be it.

  Madeline knew so very little of the world. She didn’t know what would keep two people who loved each other from marrying, but she knew that Doc, who had been so kind to her on the street, ought not be punished for whatever had been wrong between his mother and father. “I may not know of the goings-on between men and women out in the world, but I learned one thing in the community that you seem to not understand. Every man and woman is created by God for His pleasure and treasured by Him.”

  Sarah curled her lip in disgust. “Then let God treasure them. You have no business—no business at all—entertaining men like that.” Sarah exhaled as though she had been holding her breath for ages.

  Madeline narrowed her eyes. “I have no business entertaining any man unless God tells me otherwise. And you have no business dictating God’s will in my life.”

  “I’m sick to death of your holier-than-thou ways! How dare you live off of the increase of my husband’s farm and treat us this way? You think you want to live on this land? Plant your seeds in our soil? Then you will marry, and you will marry with our approval. Do you understand that?”

  “I realize that I need to establish myself as quickly as possible.” Madeline’s body shook. She feared this scene, had feared it from the moment she wrote to her sister. This woman, a complete stranger, had no way of understanding who she was.

  “Those Shakers promised me they’d educate you. They promised me you would be safe and cared for. Everyone sent their orphans to the Shakers. But if I had known what you would become,” Sarah’s voice dropped, her words and tone dark. “I would have left you at the hospital and prayed for the best. I would have never sent you to the Shakers.”

  Madeline bit her tongue. The words she wanted to scream at her sister would have severed even the strongest tie. She prayed, and prayed hard, that God give her wisdom. The Greenes, though her only family on earth, were strangers. Only God knew their hearts, and though Zeke seemed a good man, Sarah had begun to scare Madeline. “Don’t say things you might regret, sister.” Madeline’s own voice was barely above a whisper. It was that, or scream out her fear and frustration.

  “I will do this one thing: I will tell Zeke he was wrong to let Doc Lee think of you.”

  “Please don’t.” Madeline whispered again, but this time because she was scared of her own request.

  “You think he’ll buy all your seeds, don’t you?” Sarah sneered at the herb house. “Well, he won’t. Not if I have anything to say about it.”

  “And do you?” Madeline found her voice. “Do you have a say in anything around here? I think you are filled with envy because of the opportunities I’ve had.” A courage filled Madeline that scared her. Independence and group dependence and dependence on God had been woven together like a strong rope. But not for her sister. Sarah was only dependent on her husband with no will or voice of her own. Madeline would not accept that fate. “You’re sick with it, and you want to stop me from following my call because you can’t do it yourself because you’re already saddled with a man and family.”

  Sarah froze. “Saddled with a man and family? Far better than following a false prophet, Madeline Snow!”

  She couldn’t disagree with what Sarah said, despite the homesickness that ate away at her heart. Like all the orphans raised in the community, when she came of age it had been her choice: stay or go. Though leaving her home and dear friends had not been easy, she had known for many years what she would need to do when the time came.

  Mother Ann was not the female Christ, no matter what claims the prophetess had made when she established the church.

  Every day since she had left, Madeline had pined for the simple life. She missed the clean, quiet dwellings, the satisfying work, and the church services full of song and prophecy. But those prophecies had contradicted the scriptures, so Madeline had to accept that she couldn’t go back home.

  “Now you just have to realize the call to a life of celibacy is equally foreign to God’s will.” Sarah’s words brought Madeline back to the moment, and that very present threat of marriage.

  Celibacy.

  Her sister seemed to fear it, but why? Single-minded focus on God was something to be sought after, not feared. Madeline refrained from quoting St. Paul on the subject again. She’d had that discussion with her sister too many times already. Instead, she turned the conversation back to the fascinating Doc Lee, who, despite being a half-breed of unknown origin was so far the only man in Artemisia worth talking about. “Are there very many Orientals here?”

  Sarah sniffed. “There are some placer miners and such, but no one you need to worry about.” She opened the back door to the little white farmhouse and led Madeline in. “I think tomorrow I should take you to town and introduce you properly to Mr. Sutton. And to Dr. Julius as well.” Her eyes were hooded, and her words threatening, rather than full of hope. It seemed this was no love match Sarah hoped to create, but a punishment for being different.

  Madeline took her seat at the large pine farm table in front of a bowl of potatoes. She picked up a potato and a paring knife and began to cut the eyes out of it. Hands to work and hearts to God, the one true word Mother Ann had spoken. It wouldn’t matter how many doctors she met in Artemisia. She didn’t want any of them for a husband.

  Madeline’s niece and nephew tumbled through the door ready for their lunch. She pushed the potatoes to the side and helped set the table.

  Chapter 3

  Dr. Julius was in his evening years. His beard couldn’t hide his hollow cheeks or the rheumy look about his eyes. His shoulders stooped, and his hand shook as he greeted Madeline.

  “Miss Snow. What a delight.” Even his voice was quavery. He took her hand in his shaking hand and lifted it to his cold lips.

  She nodded with a bit of a curtsy, not sure how much was too much.

  Sarah looked like the cat who got into the cream. Her smile was just the decent side of a smirk.

  They sat on the edge of a hard horsehair sofa, cups of tea balanced on their knees. The doctor almost falling asleep twice. The maid had come in several times and tapped him gently on the arm to rouse him.

  “There’s not been a mine accident in several years.” Sarah’s voice was prim, but her eyes sparkled. Madeline couldn’t see why. Dr. Julius was no more likely to want a twenty-one-year-old girl around the house than he’d want a puppy.

  “No, no there hasn’t been.” Dr. Julius coughed, a chest-wracking noise that seemed to shake his whole body. “But then, there’s little enough I can do when there is an accident.” Dr. Julius leaned his head back against his chair again, his eyes fluttering shut. The clock on the wall ticked with impossible slowness, but somehow ten of the polite fifteen minutes required for the call had already passed.

  Madeline knew
she was supposed to say something as well. She had managed to say she was delighted to meet him. And she had expressed thanks to the maid who brought her tea, but the maid had glared in return. Perhaps the woman, clearly in her forties if a day, had hopes of her own for the aging doctor.

  “I prepare medicines.” Madeline leaned forward, and her cup tipped, spilling a few drops onto her grey skirt. She brushed them aside. A sharp, quick jab in the ribs from her sister indicated that that wasn’t what she was supposed to say.

  Dr. Julius sat up. “Oh? What’s that?”

  “Not so much like a pharmacist, though. More like a…” she searched for the word. She didn’t want to say patent medicine for fear he would scorn what she knew were good remedies. The clock ticked loud and slow behind her. Her sister lifted one eyebrow, challenging her to make good of her sorry excuse for a conversation. “Like the kind I hear Doc Lee uses.” She glanced at her sister again. “At least, that is what my brother in law Mr. Greene led me to believe.”

  Dr. Julius grunted. “Travel to sell them, I suppose. Snake oil and all that.”

  “No…not snake oil.” She gritted her teeth. “But I do hope to travel to sell them. I think it would be nice to do business with any doctor who had interest in my product.”

  A tiny groan escaped from Sarah. She quickly took a deep drink from her teacup.

  “So, you’re here to sell to me, then?” The doctor sat up, his eyes brightening and his whole humor seeming to improve. He picked up his teacup with a shaky hand. “And here I thought you were just another excess female in need of a quick husband.”

  “No, sir, that is not what I am.” Madeline set her teacup on the table next to the sofa. She straightened her back.

  Dr. Julius chuckled. “I’ve made it these last five years without having to take on some other man’s baggage, and I mean to keep it that way. But if you have medicine that works, you can bring it here and talk to me about it. I may want to buy it.” He sat back again, a smile on his face. “And I may not.”

  Sarah choked on her tea. She set her cup down as well and looked up at the clock.

  “I fear we’ve both disappointed you, Mrs. Greene.” Dr. Julius said. “But Miss Snow is a businesswoman and I am an old man. We’re both bound to disappoint.” His eye followed hers to the clock. “I see that my penance is done and I can send you away now. Miss Snow, come by with your medicine some other day.”

  The maid came as though she had been waiting by the door listening and showed Madeline and Sarah out.

  They walked down the road in silence until Madeline was sure they would not be overheard. Then she laughed.

  “You think this is funny?” Sarah’s voice was the same cold, stiff voice that seemed to be reserved for Madeline. “This is a mining town. A few farmers, but they’re married men. A doctor, a storekeeper. And too many miners to count.”

  “What’s wrong with miners?” Madeline kicked a pebble, wishing she could kick her sister’s intentions down the street instead.

  “There are two men in town worth marrying. You have ruined your chances with one of them. If you think Ezekiel is going to run you all over the state in hopes you will find a husband, you are wrong.”

  Madeline sighed. If she had thought it would be worth it, she’d explain yet again. But it wasn’t. “Shall we go home? I know we both have a great deal of work to do.”

  They had come to Main Street again. “We ought to go up to the store.”

  “So you can introduce me properly to Mr. Sutton?”

  “I’ll buy something while we’re there. Just…” She looked her sister up and down, then shrugged. “Just be pleasant. Mr. Sutton is a wealthy man. He’d provide well for you.”

  Madeline noticed the alley Doc Lee had led her down. Down a set of staircases, in the basement of the building she was fast approaching, Doc had an office. She wanted to stop in and see what a Chinese doctor used to heal people. She wanted to say hello, and thank him again for his rescue. She wanted…just to see him, really.

  They passed the alley and entered the store instead.

  “Mrs. Greene, Miss Snow.” Mr. Sutton acknowledged them but continued to help a tall cowboy in a showy pair of boots.

  Madeline searched through the shelves until she found a small selection of sweets. She didn’t want anything for herself, but her niece Kitty was sharing her little room without any complaint. Kitty deserved a thank you for that. And Job deserved one as well. After all, he’d had to live his whole life with Sarah. Madeline scrunched her mouth, disappointed with herself. Just because she and her sister were operating at cross-purposes didn’t mean Sarah was a bad mother. Madeline picked two sticks out…both licorice flavored, though she was tempted to offer the kids a stick of Horehound candy, one of her favorite useful herbs.

  She rolled the candies back and forth in her hand while her sister waited for Mr. Sutton to finish with his client. Meeting Dr. Julius and Mr. Sutton on the same day wasn’t a bad move, from a sales perspective, but she wished she had her samples with her. Otherwise, Mr. Sutton would have no choice but to make the same assumption Dr. Julius had. Of course, from Sarah’s perspective, Dr. Julius had been correct.

  And what exactly did she have against marriage? She had asked herself this question over and over again as she prepared for her trip west. Marriage was fine for others, she had decided. For those who were weak in their faith or who needed more than a relationship with God to find happiness in this world.

  It wasn’t easy to sift through the things she had grown up hearing and Biblical truths. Much of what the Shakers taught her could be found in the Bible, so she didn’t dare throw the baby out with the bathwater. Just because she rejected Mother Ann didn’t mean she needed to reject all of the faith of her childhood.

  “Ma’am.” The cowboy with the showy boots nodded at her as he passed.

  It was time to be presented. Madeline stifled a sigh.

  “Mrs. Greene, good to see you again.” Mr. Sutton’s voice was deep and kind.

  “Thank you.” Madeline had to hand it to her sister: she didn’t simper or fawn. She was as business-like and matter-of-fact with the storekeeper as Madeline would have been herself. “May I present my sister to you? Mr. Sutton, this is Miss Snow, recently arrived from Ohio.”

  “Miss Snow.” Mr. Sutton inclined his head, but didn’t indicate he had met her before.

  Behind her, Madeline heard someone clear his throat.

  “Miss Snow, my friend Mr. Cary.”

  “Howdy.” Mr. Cary, in the showy boots, tipped his hat. He had a sharp look in his eye that made Madeline shiver. “I’ve seen you here before, I think.” He winked.

  Madeline didn’t remember the faces of the mob that had wanted to accost her when she was in town yesterday, but surely, that was all he could be referring to. She took a deep breath, “Yes, perhaps. I did come into town yesterday.”

  Sarah hovered near Madeline. “Mr. Sutton, we’ll see you at church on Sunday?”

  “Of course.” He smiled at Sarah and then frowned, his eyebrows drawn together, at Mr. Cary. “You have a good day, sir.”

  “Sure. Always a good day when I meet a pretty lady in the store.” He leaned on the doorframe, his ankles crossed. “Which makes this two good days in a row.”

  “Can I help you ladies with your purchases?” Mr. Sutton sounded like he was ready for them all to leave.

  Sarah carried a bolt of light blue muslin to the counter. “I’d like ten yards please.”

  Madeline suspected that was a dress for her, but…she shook her head. It wouldn’t be for a wedding dress.

  She hoped.

  Mr. Sutton cut the fabric.

  “Mr. Sutton, I would very much like to speak with you about the seeds I have for sale.” Madeline hated the shaky tone to her voice, but speaking to Mr. Sutton didn’t feel comfortable.

  He looked up. “Yes.” He wrapped the fabric in paper. “I’ll come by the farm one of these days and speak with Mr. Greene about it.”

&nb
sp; “I’m sure that’s gracious of you, sir. But…I don’t know that he really knows as much about it as I do. I’d be happy to bring them in, or my catalog.”

  “That won’t be necessary.”

  Sarah paid for her fabric, and Madeline paid for the candy.

  “I’ll come by on Thursday evening.” He spoke to Sarah, not Madeline.

  Sarah beamed. “Thank you. We look forward to it.”

  The exchange bothered Madeline. He should have spoken to her, asked to talk to her about the products, not spoken to Sarah about seeing Zeke. It rankled her, though she ought to have expected it.

  Mr. Cary was waiting on the walk. “May I walk you ladies home?”

  Sarah looked him up and down, not trying to hide her assessment of him.

  In addition to his clean, new boots, he wore new, clean blue denim pants and a crisp buttoned shirt. His face was clean-shaven. Madeline was fairly sure he wasn’t a miner.

  “How kind.” Sarah nodded at him. She then gave Madeline the same long look, though what she was looking for, Madeline couldn’t guess. She wore the same long-sleeved, high-necked dress and shawl every day. If Sarah was wondering what might be attracting the interest of a man like Cary, Madeline herself was just as confused.

  Mr. Cary took Sarah’s packages from her. “Miss Snow seems to be getting around.” His voice was smooth but that didn’t hide the vulgar nature of his words. “First Smokey, then the chink, now that storekeeper.”

  Sarah stopped.

  “You ought to get the young lady married, Mrs. Greene, before she ruins the family name.”

  “What are you saying, Mr. Cary?” Despite the fire in her eyes, Sarah kept her voice cool.

  “Only what folks in town are saying, ma’am.” He narrowed his eyes as he smiled at Madeline.

  “You’re a fool if you listen to talk.” Madeline was about to tell him to just go away, but she thought better of it. He seemed like a man who would only make things worse when he was mad.